Wednesday, March 08, 2006

She Did What?



Odd things happen to me all of the time, and I'm always exposed to the weirdest comments and behaviors, but when you're not well it takes on an entirely different hue. I'm not given over to reporting much about my life, but I felt I should explain that I haven't been writing much because I'm not well. I'm still making the rounds of doctor's offices trying to even name what it is, but in the meantime, it makes for a very dull life when I'm just working and being at home feeling fatigued and out of it.






Twice this week I had to go in to a doctor's office for blood work, five vials in all, and on the first visit, when I was signing out, the receptionist was complimenting my hands and my nail color ("Strawberry Marguarita"). This girl was a nail polish enthusiast. When she heard I was wearing one of the colors from OPI's new "Mexico" collection, she said, "Oh. I have on one of those as well, but on my toes." She then proceeded to remove her shoe and sock and hoisted up her foot, with toe ring, to show me OPI's "My Chihuahua Bites" red.



Just to establish how sick I am, earlier this week, after a long day and too stunned to even move in the evening I had on the television watching a Maryland Public TV (MPT) show called John Denver: A Song's Best Friend. I hate John Denver.


No. I mean, I really hate John Denver. I've never been able to stomach that let's wander the mountainside picking wildflowers watching the eagles soar braying kumbaya voice of his, but I sat there and watched the whole thing. The next day I thought, "Man, you are really sick." John Denver. The litmus test.


42 Comments:

Blogger Ryan Mrazik said...

That John Denver special was also on public television down in Miami over this past weekend. Even though all of us watching professed extreme dislilke for Mr. Denver, we all sat there and watched it from start to finish, regularly interrupting the broadcast with "Man, I really hate this guy". Why we didn't just shut it off, I don't know.

Good luck with the illness.

11:44 AM  
Blogger A Unique Alias said...

"that let's wander the mountainside picking wildflowers watching the eagles soar braying kumbaya voice"

That is delicious.

11:46 AM  
Blogger I-66 said...

Get well soon, Cube! I've been wondering of your whereabouts and was one more day from an e-mail check-in.

Just a question:

"She then proceeded to remove her shoe and sock and hoisted up her foot, with toe ring, to shoe me OPI's "My Chihuahua Bites" red."

Freudian typo? The w and e are right next to eachother.

11:53 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"I've had two years to grow claws Mother. Jungle red."

Don't worry about the time between blog entries, says Thaimex: it's procrastination week.

I'd love to procrastinate, he says, but he can't get around to it.

grince

12:35 PM  
Blogger Washington Cube said...

Tales: Now I'm more creeped out than ever. Some weird John Denver mountain mojo? I remember his death well. I was staying up on Cape Cod. There are a lot of strange wind currents that pass through there, so it's a not uncommon occurrence for small planes to go down, as John Denver's did. He died out on the West Coast, and I remember reading a quote of his in the newspaper. Apparently Denver said to someone before he took off in this balsa wood and rubber band plane, "I'm going to go buzz my friend Clint Eastwood's house." That just struck me as such a stupid way to die, stuck with that quote hanging out there ~~~in those clear blue waters~~~

AUA: Can you tell he still really gripes my ass? Not grip..gripe.

I-66: I need to fix that. Sure was a Freudian petticoat. The next day I had to revisit that office and she shouted out with glee to see me. I wasn't feeling too chipper, but she was. She was singing along with the radio, "What's Goin' On." I rousted myself enough to reply, "Marvin Gaye."

Grince: The Women, Norma Shearer. When I was a little girl, I would watch that movie on tv, then go trailing around the house with my fingers arched and flayed out screaming, "Jungle Red." A little five-year old drama queen in the making.

2:13 PM  
Blogger kris said...

That is sick. But at least you haven't resorted to listening to Richard Marx songs. Then we'd know things were really bad.

I hope you feel better and get clarification on what is happening very soon, cube.

3:14 PM  
Blogger Phil said...

Hope you get well soon, Cube.

John Denver is pretty creepy is his own way, but he recorded a hell of a Christmas album with the Muppets.

3:25 PM  
Blogger Washington Cube said...

Kris: Another one! We should find one singer that sets the hallmark of just how sick you really are if you listen to them. Yanni? We'll have to work on it.

Phil: I'm sorry Phil, but I just can't get into any of Denver's stuff. One thing I noticed consistently when they were playing his songs was that he has no sense of shading a word of seeking any nuance in a lyric. It's just all bleated out in the same tone.

3:35 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

John and Denver...those two words should never be uttered together! ha ha

Hope you feel better, Cube. It is sad to know that you are not feeling well. I hope the doctors figure what is ailing you and get you back wonderful self.

3:45 PM  
Blogger Washington Cube said...

Chase: Me too. It's scarey having three doctors say "I don't know." I guess the important thing is that I am actively working on trying to find answers.

4:11 PM  
Blogger Phil said...

Careful - Yanni might whip your a$$.

4:59 PM  
Blogger Megan said...

Feel better!

(That first picture of the foot freaked me the heck out. Nasty!)

4:59 PM  
Blogger Washington Cube said...

Phil: Yeah..I read that about Yanni. God knows what Zamfir does to his women.

Megan: I'm glad that shot freaked you out. It was taken from a foot fetish website.

5:19 PM  
Blogger Reya Mellicker said...

I'm so sorry to hear you're not well. Hope you're soon feeling MUCH better. It's wonderful to see a post from you. I've missed you.

6:06 PM  
Blogger m.a. said...

Cube,

Please feel well soon. I'm so sorry to hear that you're under the weather (so to speak). I too understand the feelings about John Denver. But please feel better.

6:26 PM  
Blogger Washington Cube said...

Reya: Me too. I am hating this. And thanks for missing me. It's so easy to disappear off the internet and *poof* you are just gone.

6:27 PM  
Blogger Washington Cube said...

Momentary: Thank you. Mainly I want someone to name it for me so I can deal with it.

6:27 PM  
Blogger Melissa said...

I know what having a mystery illness feels like. Even more frustrating that the doctors can't figure it out. Hope you get better soon.

8:01 PM  
Blogger Hammer said...

While on the whole I'm with you on John Denver, your failure to put an asterisk beside "Take Me Home Country Road" (one of the greatest Karaoke and cover songs EVER) and exclude it from scorn has left me feeling bitter and betrayed. Despite this transgression, I nevertheless remain a steadfast Cube supporter, especially in this time of uncertainy, and if there were a way to give a supercomputer a big ol' hug and buy her a big ol' martini, I'd do it faster than you could say "West Virginia mountain mama!"

8:20 PM  
Blogger Washington Cube said...

Just reading about your Craig's List weirdos is enough to cheer, Velvet.

Travis: I refuse, and I used to climb mountains in West Virginia so you would think I would be sympatico. Once at the very tippy top of a granite mountain I found a piece of a spine, this HUGE thing. My mother was up there with me and she said,I'm laughing remembering...."It must be a cow to be that big." I said, "Ma! How is a cow going to get up a sheer granite face and wind up here?" My father recently picked said bone piece up off my bookcase and he thought it must have been a bear.

9:28 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Cube...feel better soon...we miss your witty banter.

DRFS/Sue

9:42 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Passing Cubie a bag of Catnip. Make some Catnip tea...It is good for what ailes you. And get well for goodness sake. You sound like me when my thyroid was going haywire. have you had your T3, T4 and TSH levels checked lately?

I could hardly get up enough energy to care. Putting yourself through John Denver anything sounds about right. If you find yourself watching "oh God, You Devil" dial 911...fast.

>^, ,^<

10:10 PM  
Blogger Washington Cube said...

Sue: Thank you, and I hope so.

Wrethy: When they run this bloodwork that was like Tom Cruise's appetites in Interview with a Vampire, they are supposed to be checking a ton of things. I am at the point, they can tell me I have Dengue Fever and I wouldn't be surprised.

10:30 PM  
Blogger Blue Dog Art said...

Dear Sweet Cube--I hope you are back on your feet soon. [pun intended]

10:46 PM  
Blogger VP of Dior said...

i wish i could afford all the OPI colors. $7???


but i hope you feel better soon :)

10:58 PM  
Blogger Barbara said...

I have really missed you. I'm sorry you are sick. Seeing those little tubes fill up with your blood doesn't make you feel any better. I hope you at least get a diagnosis soon. Not knowing what is wrong makes you feel crazy as well as sick!

11:15 PM  
Blogger Hammer said...

"Why, Cube, what an ugly thing to say about John Denver. I abhor ugliness. Does this mean we're not friends anymore? You know, Cube, if I thought you weren't my friend, I just don't think I could BEAR it."

11:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"... 'cause I'm leavin' on a jet plane... " Cube, did you know that was John Denver's first hit ? recorded by Peter, Paul and Mary in 1969 ? Of course not, you weren't even born then. Prophetic ? Death Wish ? maybe... Also, in 1988, "Aviation Week & Space Technology" reported that John Denver asked Soviet space officials to launch him to the Mir space station... spooky stuff here. And his last flight wasn't his first airplane mishap. And when he was tried for DUI, his defense was he had a thyroid condition that made alcohol tests unreliable. Hey, Cube, Wreth was talkin about a thyroid and you're illin'... could there be a Denver Cubed connection ? One rumor about his death, supposedly he didn't take a bath before his flight, but he did wash up on shore.

12:53 AM  
Blogger Stef said...

I hope you feel better soon, and are up and active and no longer need to be sleeping a lot. Cuz I just googled John Denver lyrics and came up with the creepiest:

I watch you sleeping brave and unaware
You don't know yet so you don't care
I want you to know it's hard out there

I watch you sleeping little angel face
And on behalf of the human race
Welcome to this crazy place

I watch you sleeping
I watch you sleeping
I watch you sleeping
I watch you sleeping
I watch you sleeping
I watch you sleeping


Get better and out of bed soon! :-)

11:57 AM  
Blogger cs said...

I hope you get well soon and keep the posts coming. John Denver will forever be linked to the muppets with me, so he isn't all bad. But your ripping on him was hilarious.

2:22 PM  
Blogger playfulinnc said...

Sunshine on my shoulder makes me happy.

I swear my mom thinks that all ailments are from a lack of Vitamin D.

Hope they figure it out~but don't stress about us...we'll just read the archives.

4:12 PM  
Blogger Lucy said...

Ugh -- John Denver. Truly, you are ill.

I've had plenty of mystery illnesses, myself. Maybe I'll throw a couple of my guessed diagnoses your way. Fifth's Disease? Lyme Disease? Mono? (the last one turned out to be true, unfortunately.)

10:11 PM  
Blogger kob said...

I read this post twice, and it just makes me realize how much I miss your work.

12:00 AM  
Blogger Ryan Mrazik said...

Seeing as you're laid up, not sure if you saw this over on Rock Creek Rambler post about bar etiquette: "5. If you play John Denver on the jukebox, everyone else in the bar has the right to stab you in the kidney with a broken beer bottle."

8:26 AM  
Blogger DC Cookie said...

Oh Cubie...

3:09 PM  
Blogger mysterygirl! said...

Hope you soon get a name for what's ailing you so you can get all better! You've been missed (although who doesn't love seeing Mark Trail at the top of your blog?).

I don't know the last time I've made incited someone to take off their sock and shoe-- that's fabulous. Fun pictures-- love the last one especially.

4:36 PM  
Blogger Megarita said...

I love a good pedicure, but the foot shot threw me off. Am I really the only one who grew up listening to John Denver? I heart him, and you cannot stop me. BUT, I'll turn down "Leaving on a Jet Plane" if it will make you feel better, Cube. I'll even come up with a clever name for your ailment as needed! Take good care...

7:27 AM  
Blogger Sparklebot said...

I wanted to comment, but, I too have been under the weather (though, not with mystery-sickness) and have gotten behind on blog readership. When there are 38 comments ahead of mine, I wonder what the point of adding mine is. But, I hate John Denver, and I like Cube. So, there it is.

12:50 PM  
Blogger alwswrite said...

Wow, see what I miss when I'm off the grid? I hope you're feeling better, Cube.

1:45 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

JOHN DENVER ROCKS!!!!!

He helped the earth with the money he made{www.windstar.org} he was on the world hunger comittie, he helped out in saving lots of endangered wildlife, he helped in political stuff, etc...

He was more then a singer~~ how many singers do what he did -- go to http://www.wstar.org/ , www.johndenver.org, or www.johndenver.com.

Yes, there are people out there who don't like his songs but just like meeting someone you need to really get to know them before you can say you hate them.


I knew him he really was great, smart man.

10:23 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

this for STEF:


John wrote that song for his new born girl. He loved his kids more than his life.

10:28 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

OPPS I GAVE A BAD WEBSITE ...IT's www.wstar.org


sorry

10:33 AM  

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